Familiarity & Contempt

I think Facebook is a wonderful thing. It has facilitated my reconnecting with people whom in some cases I had not seen in decades. It also provides a way for me to communicate with people in different time zones and different countries. I have rekindled dormant friendships and had a chance to end embattlements and mend broken hearts (my own included). For all of the aforementioned and more, I am truly grateful for Facebook.

However, I have noticed that some people do things on Facebook that I can only hope they would never do in real life. Allow me to illustrate my point: I decide to go over to a friend's house uninvited. I don't speak to my friend ahead of time or go inside. I put up a billboard on my friend's lawn that contains a quote that I think is just great.
Does anyone think that's a good idea? Is that something that people do? Of course not. I’ve never done anything even resembling that, and never would. Yet, there are people on Facebook who seem to think this is perfectly acceptable. It isn't. Please stop it. And stop sending me virtual stuff. I don't need a virtual drink, hug, flower arrangement, blessing or anything else that doesn't actually exist.

The next time you see me, if you really know me—let’s not extend the friend metaphor beyond reason—feel free to hug me. I like hugs from my friends. In fact, my friends and I hug each other with startling regularity. I don't ever recall a time when a friend "gave" me a virtual hug. Because you can't give someone a figment of your imagination no matter how much you really want to. I know you think it’s cute. It isn’t. Please stop it.

Some of you reading this might think I'm being harsh. Thank you for paying attention. If anyone reading this is truly offended by anything I've written here, I sincerely suggest you virtually kiss my actual...